Elimination of aggression and bullying through prosociality

Elimination of aggressiveness and bullying through prosociality „Nie všetko, čo človek dokáže, človek môže.“ T. Halík
„Agresivita, podobne ako oheň, je dobrý sluha, ale zlý pán. Každý z nás ju má vo svojej základnej osobnostnej výbave. Môže nám pomôcť, ale aj komplikovať život. Aby sme s ňou vedeli optimálne narábať, mali by sme jej rozumieť.“
The energy of negativity, stress, failures, frustration, inner dissatisfaction, and imbalance has all become part of today's life. As a consequence, there can be behavior that not only displeases our environment but may also hurt it—aggression. It is very often aimed at someone close to us, to vent anger.

The word aggression comes from the Latin aggressio, meaning a sortie or attack. Aggression is an act in which violence toward some object is expressed, or enmity and aggressiveness with an intent to hurt. It is one of the common reactions to frustration, and through it people try to cope with a difficult life situation they cannot handle.

Aggressiveness is among the forms of extreme behavior and in psychology is defined as a personality trait. Its verbal form is very common and often goes unnoticed by us. It can include, for example, imposing one’s own opinions and attacking another person through ironic remarks. An aggressive person imposes him- or herself at the expense of others, does not respect their rights and demands. If he or she fails, he or she blames others. Such a person manipulates others and has difficulty controlling emotions. It is possible to speak of psychological bullying when an aggressive person humiliates and mocks others around him or her.

In psychoanalytic terms, aggressive behavior is one common reaction to frustration. We can distinguish four levels of aggression:

1. It does not show outwardly; the behavior is controlled internally (sometimes blushing or paling; teeth clenched).
2. It is expressed verbally through swearing.
3. Destructive behavior or breaking objects.
4. Physical violence, including killing. (In: http://sk.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agresia_(psychológia).)

Aggression is one way of dealing with a difficult life situation. It is used for removing obstacles head-on; if it is successful, it tends to recur.
Unfortunately, student aggressiveness in schools is now more the rule than the exception. Bullying is spreading more and more, whether between peers or between older students bullying younger ones. Sometimes it is psychological—mocking, humiliating, excluding—or coercive and violent, such as extortion, money demands, and fighting. Students are speaking ever more vulgarly, often even in front of teachers, and this verbal aggression frequently turns into physical aggression.

Every teacher should be oriented in the issue of bullying, know its basic forms and signs, identify manifestations, handle incidents of bullying, and above all implement effective prevention.
Bullying in the school environment is a psychological, pedagogical, and legal phenomenon. We also consider it a problem that current schools need to define specifically, define clearly, and address urgently. Bullying in the school environment can be analyzed from three perspectives:

1. From a psychological perspective, as a specific disorder of behavior (Vágnerová, 2004).
2. From a pedagogical perspective, as problem behavior (Ďurič, Grác, Štefanovič, 1991).
3. From a legal perspective, as violent criminal activity committed by a child or juvenile; in the case of a bullying juvenile, we can speak of youth delinquency (Matoušek, Kroftová, 1998).

The three perspectives above overlap and complement each other, since the issue is complex and it is almost impossible to separate school bullying as problem behavior from the psychological context of behavioral disorder, or to omit its legal consequences.
The word bullying comes from the French word chicane, meaning malicious harassment, tormenting, persecution, or bullying. Kolář (2001) defines this phenomenon as follows: “One or more students intentionally and mostly repeatedly torment and enslave a classmate or classmates and use aggression and manipulation to do so.” Bullying is interpreted as a serious disturbance of social relationships, whose resolution primarily lies in the hands of teachers themselves.

The authors of the teacher handbook, Tholtová, Žuffová, Sučáková (2000), give the expanded and most frequently cited definition in the professional literature: “Bullying is when one child or a group of children says ugly and unpleasant things to another child, hits him or her, kicks, threatens him or her, locks him or her in a room, and so on. These incidents may repeat, and for the bullied child it is very hard to avoid them. We also call bullying repeated mockery or unpleasant remarks about one’s parents. Usually we do not call an occasional fight or argument between equally matched rivals bullying.”

Bullying is a manifestation of social pathology where the primary aim is to hurt someone. Unlike simple aggression, it differs in the aim of hurting another and, additionally, gaining some kind of reward for one’s own benefit. Bullying is really the abuse of power or authority. The term includes malicious harassment, shoving, pushing another child, fights, kicking, tormenting, persecution, extortion, humiliation, nicknaming, intimidation, destruction of personal belongings, and so on (Říčan, 1995).
It is targeted and repeated use of violence against a student or group of students who, for various reasons, cannot or cannot defend themselves. Bullying appears in many forms, which can have consequences for psychological and physical health.
According to Kolář (1997), any definition of bullying should include these essential features:

• A clear intent to hurt another, either physically or mentally. For example, hitting, pushing, stealing money or belongings, hiding and destroying things, but also mockery, swearing, and social exclusion.
• The aggressor may be one child or a group of children (asymmetric aggression).
• Incidents are repeated. A single action is usually not considered bullying.
• A power imbalance between aggressor and victim.

Bullying appears in direct form: physical attacks, insulting nicknames, curses, mockery, harsh commands from the aggressor to do something against the victim’s will, taking away possessions, etc. Bullying can also appear in indirect form, for example, through ignoring and overlooking the victim. It can take place in class and mainly during breaks, on the way to and from school, or outside instructional time.

The aggressor is the one who bullies, often tormenting or harassing physically or verbally. Most often it is a boy, but there is no exception for a girl. He or she suffers from feelings of inferiority and envies classmates’ successes in schoolwork. Generally confident and not anxious, the aggressor has a dominant desire to dominate, control others, and assert themselves without restraint; hurting others is a source of pleasure. They are easily offended and perceive aggression toward themselves even where none exists. In essence, they do not differ from others. Sometimes the aggressor has a weaker physique, but recklessness, maliciousness, or a desire to dominate predominates. Such an aggressor is mostly found in verbal bullying. In practice, we often meet students who suffer from inferiority feelings. They do not stand out in anything or are unsuccessful at school, and therefore want to gain respect from the peer group through aggressive acts.

Verbal aggressiveness is linked, according to Frankovský and Bajan (1998, pp. 317–319), to the level of argumentativeness. Verbally more aggressive communicators are more willing to defend not only their own opinion but also the opinion of the whole group; they do not give up and argue more persistently even when unsuccessful. They display greater confidence in their own abilities to assert their opinion, and after discussion they are more relaxed, not burdened by guilt or self-reproach that they behaved correctly.

Aggression and aggressive behavior can take varied forms. The German educator Winkel (In: Határ, 2004) identified five perspectives of children’s and adolescents’ aggression:

1. Aggression as a form of play. The child’s goal is only to test his or her own strength.
2. Aggression as a defense mechanism, by which the victim defends against the attacker.
3. Aggression as a reaction of a frustrated individual. The child seeks replacement for defeat by targeting weaker individuals.
4. Aggression as a form of curiosity, through which children test where their limits are.
5. Aggression as an inappropriate form of the need for love. The child strives for attention of the surroundings mainly through negative behavior.

The tendency toward such behavior is formed already in the first years of life. Temperament plays a role (impulsivity, thoughtless action), as does the style of upbringing (lack of interest, emotional coldness, indifference, humiliation, physical punishment). The aggressor is usually an egotistical person; respect for other people is foreign to him or her. They do not understand the suffering and pain of others and do not know what empathy is. Their moral boundaries are flexible, and they can always find an acceptable justification for immoral behavior.

Participants in bullying are the aggressor and the victim. Elliott and Killpatrick (1994) identify two types of aggressors, with these behavioral manifestations:

• the situational aggressor – such children need clear and firm rules and should understand the consequences of their acts,
• the chronic aggressor – in these children it is very hard to change behavior. Without intensive support they will likely engage in criminal activity and cause problems for their environment.

According to Mrúzová (2007), an occasional aggressor may have some or all of the following characteristics: they are aggressive toward peers, teachers, parents, and siblings; they respond impulsively; they want to be a leader; they may be physically strong; they can be persuasive and manipulative; they also show other antisocial behaviors; they have a high level of self-esteem because bullying gives them a sense of importance; they may be spoiled. A chronic aggressor feels insecure, feels humiliated, is often bullied by parents or siblings, is under pressure to be successful, has no permission to express emotions, feels different, cannot control himself or herself, has a positive attitude toward violence, behaves aggressively most of the time, and refuses to take responsibility for actions.

If we want to change the behavior of the bully, we should explain what is expected of him or her, discuss and set short-term goals. It is appropriate to praise and reward success and good behavior, practice role-playing in class (empathy with the victim), stress management, relaxation, leaving a situation, as well as recognition, self-awareness, and apology.

Defining the concept of victim is more difficult. Criteria for identifying a victim in a peer group are varied. Sometimes it is a matter of chance. The most important finding is that any student can become a victim of bullying. However, it is often precisely the student who has been a target of aggression for a long time, who is a target of physical attacks, mocking, and humiliation.
Types of bullying victims:

• First type: the student is passive, anxious, and insecure. They are unable to defend themselves.
• Second type: the victim is provocative. They irritate and mock others. If someone attacks them, they defend themselves.

Any student can become a victim. According to Mrúzová (2007), there are several victim types: Passive victims are anxious and unsure, sensitive and quiet, they respond to bullying by crying or withdrawing, and have a negative self-image, a sense of failure, and lack self-esteem. They are lonely and isolated from peers, teachers, and others, and it is unlikely they will retaliate. Active victims are anxious and aggressive, provocative, and disturbed. Chronic victims have a poor self-image and low self-esteem; they feel bullying only confirms their poor self-view. They become angry if told they are good, because it does not fit their self-image, they sabotage their own good work, say that no one loves them, adapt slowly to new situations, are nervous and alert, and lack a sense of humor.

A very strong influence on a person during childhood and adolescence is also the school, apart from the family. It is a place of possible positive influence. Reflection on adverse social conditions leads us to a greater awareness of the need for education. Education affects the whole personality of a person and then all of that person’s outputs, whether at the level of attitudes or specific behavior and responsibility for one’s personal contribution to any relationship.

Current school education also has this possibility through the project of education for prosociality. This project understands “learning about a well-lived life” (Spaemann, 1990). It concerns human life as a whole and behavior so that life is meaningful and leads a young person to happiness. The prosocial education project takes as its basis two psychological needs of the person—love and being loved. Prosociality is behavior oriented toward another person; it is cooperative, helpful behavior without expectation of reward. A prosocial person, while caring for another, also becomes whole—fulfilling the psychological need to love.

Lencz (2002) recalls Professor Roche-Olivar’s definition of prosociality, who defines this term with four characteristics:

1. behavior in the benefit of the other,
2. behavior with no expectation of external reward,
3. behavior that supports reciprocity,
4. behavior that does not disrupt the identity of the subject.

Prosocial behavior is:

• without reward,
• motivated by an internal need to help another person (love),
• the aim of education for prosocial behavior is to create conditions in which students and adults develop such behavior from their own needs.

Roberto Rochelle Olivar (1992), who provided the theoretical basis of prosociality, claimed that there are 15 variables (dimensions) that answer his questions: dignity of the human person and self-respect; attitudes and abilities in interpersonal relationships; positive behavior and positive evaluation of other people; creativity and initiative; communication and expression of one’s own emotions; interpersonal and social empathy; assertiveness, self-control, conflict resolution with others; real and modeled prosocial models (parental patterns); prosocial behavior (helping, cooperation, giving, responsibility, care for others, sharing, and so on); comprehensive prosociality (solidarity, nonviolence, civil disobedience, social critique, social problems); accepting the child as it is; expression of sympathy (unconditional acceptance); attribution of prosociality; inductive discipline—pointing out the consequences of behavior; encouraging prosociality and supporting prosociality. This model covers all age groups (including adults). It must, however, be adapted to age. If implemented with younger children, it can later also be implemented with adults. After implementation, relationships changed between student and student, but also teacher and student and teacher and teacher.

The Slovak model, whose authors are Lencz and Krížová (2004), follows 10 of Olivar’s variables. We call them core themes, competencies, or content we need to teach students. These themes are built into school curricula and are very useful, even for reducing bullying, according to Krížová (2006):

1. Open communication – teaching a young person to communicate openly is one of the keys to a quality life. We understand communication as transmitting and receiving meanings in order to understand each other better. It draws attention to the importance of social communication and creates through exercises opportunities to cultivate it.<.li>- Dignity of the human person – positive self-evaluation. Realizing the value of one’s own dignity is the first step toward accepting another human being. A condition for perceiving the value of another person is understanding one’s own value. - Positive evaluation of others. One of the main points in education to prosociality. If we want to do good to others and be kind to them, we need to perceive others positively. A key aspect of this theme is praise, discovering good in others. <.li>- Creativity and initiative. Every person has some degree of creativity. But it must be developed. Experiencing success gives a young person a greater sense of self-esteem. With creativity, self-control is also necessarily brought into action, and that is important in the concept of self-evaluation. If a person is to be prosocial, they need creativity skills.
   • Expression of emotions. Young people who can express their feelings in a cultivated way are less conflictual, perhaps because they are calmer. We guide young people to identify their emotions, name the reason for their emotional state, and express it in a cultivated manner.
   • Empathy – means putting oneself into the situation of another. We cannot do good for someone according to our assumptions but according to their needs. That other person must be able to say of us that we are prosocial. Therefore, we teach young people empathy, a very rare quality for everyday life. We are born with some empathy, but it can be completely neglected through inappropriate upbringing or intentionally undeveloped through upbringing.
   • Assertiveness – means self-assertion. A prosocial person has, among their attributes, a component of direct, clear communication of legitimate claims. They can culturally demand their rights; if they decide, they can also accept compromise. While asserting their rights, they are courteous but persistent. They cannot be manipulated by guilt and they themselves strive to ensure that their demands on others contain no elements of manipulation.

• Real and displayed models. The influence of the environment, especially of the closest people, leaves a strong formative mark on each of us. In later stages, peers, various role models, and media idols influence youth. We emphasize their responsibility for their own behavior. They can also be role models for someone. This also includes presenting prosocial models.
• Prosocial behavior in concrete form. The theme offers familiarization with types of prosocial behavior—cooperation, friendship, helping, giving, sharing. Young people try out the regularities of each behavior type in simulated situations and also in the field, then discuss them. They recognize the main distinguishing sign of prosociality, which is selflessness. They reflect on how it is represented in each type of prosocial behavior and use this criterion for feedback on their own conduct.
• Comprehensive prosociality. This concept is oriented toward broader society. Not only person-to-person behavior, but prosocial behavior from an individual to a group and between groups. The theme provides an opportunity to think about what leads people to engage in the common good.

According to Mrúzová and Olšavská (1998), the task of school prevention is to develop a school discipline code and a system of educational measures, and to anchor in the school’s internal regulations clear rules regarding prevention of bullying, harassment, violence, vandalism, and other forms of pathological phenomena.
It is difficult to guarantee students 100% protection, but teachers can advise the victim to avoid dangerous places, keep the aggressor under constant supervision at school, and provide a place in school where the victim can go if they feel threatened and frightened. It is appropriate to assign the victim specific adults from the teaching staff, or even students, whom they can turn to; convince the child to report whenever the aggressor tries to bully them again. If they do not tell us, we cannot help them (Ferjenčíková, 2003).
A markedly lower occurrence of bullying is found where anti-bullying prevention is given adequate attention, where clear rules apply and enforcement is consistent, where good interpersonal relationships and open communication prevail. On the other hand, bullying is supported by inconsistent rule enforcement, feelings of unfairness, and favoritism toward students.

If we do not act, we tolerate bullying. Victims feel they have no value and no chance for fairness; it is not worth reporting problems, it is better not to trust people and stay silent, be submissive, and live in fear. Perpetrators learn that brute force is better than politeness and intelligence, and that people can be controlled through anger and force; they learn to act from a position of power and dominance, driving fear. Schools must put into practice the basic preventive principle: “We are a school where bullying is not tolerated in any form!” This basic principle must apply from the first day of the school year without exception for all students, parents, and school staff. Children must be taught to realize they are responsible for their actions.

Bullying prevention

Most preventive measures against bullying should start at home, before a child enters school. Parents can help by: being an example of good relationships, handling their own aggression, clearly communicating that violent aggression is unacceptable, immediately stopping any sign of unacceptable aggression, identifying and naming the effects of aggression, and teaching caring and empathetic relationships.

The necessity of active prevention of bullying is emphasized. It is not realistic to expect young people to naturally outgrow their aggression without adult intervention. Active learning is highly important in the prevention of aggression and bullying.
Teach responsibility for oneself and others: It is the only way to teach young people responsibility, and that is to give them responsibility. We must increase responsibility step by step and adapt it to specific demands. This can be done only with good understanding of what each person needs and with constant monitoring.
Teach self-respect and respect for others: Self-respect and respect for others are closely connected. They complement each other and are mirror images of one another. From a student who lacks self-respect, we cannot expect them to respect others.
Teach care and gentleness: A good adult example is one of the best ways to teach care. When a young person feels cared for, they will also care for others. Sometimes it is necessary to teach them how to be loving and gentle.
Teach appropriate assertiveness and aggression: Properly directed and adequately regulated aggression is not bad. Children learn to control aggression even in play. Here too, firm monitoring is required, and if necessary, intervention when aggression gets out of hand.
Set firm rules for everyday life: To a certain extent, we can view manifestations of unacceptable aggression or bullying as failures of discipline—either the student has not learned rules of sensible behavior, or they intentionally broke them. The importance of learning to manage aggressive impulses, as well as clear and steady discipline, is a necessary condition for learning what is right and what is wrong.
Monitor and steer aggression: Bullying usually occurs where control is weakest. Good control is not only highly effective; it also allows immediate intervention as soon as bullying is detected before greater harm occurs.
Avoid encouraging aggression: The hard work described above would have little effect if bullying and other unacceptable aggressive behaviors were simultaneously encouraged and rewarded.
From this it follows that responsibility for bullying cannot be focused only on the bullying person. Parents, teachers, other adults, and even victims themselves have their share of responsibility. It is unlikely that it will be effective to focus only on the bullying person (Centrum ochrany detí, Laurinská 2, 811 01 Bratislava 1. In: http://www.ochranadeti.sk/).

Specific activities against bullying

A declaration against bullying should be a frontal action in all areas of school life and outside school.
Proposed activities:

• a formal declaration against bullying on the first day of the school year,
• mapping the situation of bullying at school with an anonymous questionnaire,
• regular repetition of the situation mapping with a questionnaire, and possibly other methods of detecting bullying,
• during the school year, declaring a week against bullying, during which a radio segment is held, participation in an art competition, and similar activities take place,
• brainstorming ideas for concrete rewards and punishments and solving model situations of bullying during ethics classes,
• a competition for the best anti-bullying poster during the campaign,
• joint aesthetic improvement of critical places where bullying occurred, according to students’ proposals,
• selection of class and school teachers’ representatives to address and sanction individual cases of bullying according to the school disciplinary code,
• competition for a logo and slogan on anti-bullying t-shirts, which can then be included among rewards,
• familiarization with the Criminal Code and basic information about bullying,
• student presentations, discussion clubs, articles in the school newspaper, talks with a lawyer.

All ways of declaring and publicizing anti-bullying work must be part of an overall strategy. They should make sense and be fulfilled through real actions. They must be emotionally strong enough to affect students’ attitudes toward bullying. The school should regularly monitor the situation, run a permanent anti-bullying campaign, organize discussion clubs with youth about the rules in place, pay systematic attention to dangerous zones in school through inspections of such zones where bullying occurs. It should introduce anti-bullying boxes and provide attractive use of free time. Causes of aggressiveness are mainly social and economic in nature. Among the most common are emotional frustration, unfulfilled goals, anxiety, lack of psychological and physical relaxation, and it can also be triggered by sudden and unexpected threat. If we can control and channel our aggression properly, it will help us overcome difficult situations, provide healthy self-confidence, and often influence our life in a proper direction. For a psychologically balanced person, it can mean a kind of motivation in achieving a particular goal or in competitiveness.

Autor: PaedDr. Zuzana Birknerová, PhD., Prešovská univerzita v Prešove, Fakulta manažmentu

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