“Let us create a stable family for children, take care of them, and love your children, because the one who rocks the cradle, rocks the whole world.” St. John Paul II.
Introduction
St. Mother Teresa once said: “If we could bring love back into families, the world would become heaven.” And this is indeed so, because if we want to change something, we must first begin with ourselves and then with our closest circle, which is the family. Many children do not even know the so-called “closest circle”; they are set aside like some goods, which ultimately means deprivation of love from those who are most important for the child itself. Professional parenthood tries to return to the child at least a bit of love and joy that their parents, not always through their own fault, were not able to provide.
The aim of this article is to delve into the issue of professional parenthood itself and to become familiar with its positives and negatives. Through quantitative research, we tried to find out from university students and their parents their opinion on professional parenthood, so that in this way we could also increase awareness of what professional parenthood is and whether there is interest in undertaking such a mission in the future. In the article we also present the results of our research, where we arrived at interesting findings. We believe that every child deserves to grow up in a complete family so that the old and familiar saying is confirmed once again: The parent is not the one who gives birth to a child, but the one who raises them and makes them feel love, safety, and the warmth of family.
In the concluding part of the article, we will focus on evaluating the results of our quantitative research and comparing other research on professional parenthood from the viewpoints of experts and the public.
1 Positives and negatives of professional parenthood
Author Roháček sees the basic problem as the fact that, legally, professional parenthood is a form of institutional care, while from the child’s perspective it is family care, that is, care provided in a family (Roháček, 2008, p. 55). The nonprofit association Návrat has more than ten years of practice with professional parents, and according to their assessment, its operation in reality brought both positive and negative experiences: on the one hand, various tensions and frustrations, and on the other, enrichment and fulfillment in the lives of many children and adults (Roháček, 2008, p. 55).
The most basic problem perceived by professional parents themselves (PR) and by entities involved in this process is financing. On this point, professional parents agreed (a total of 82% of them), as did directors of children’s homes (90%), representatives of nonprofit organizations (88%), and offices for labour, social affairs, and family, specifically departments of social-legal child protection and social curatela (51%), though the latter to a lesser degree. Among the problems of financing professional parenthood as an institution we can include: generally low funding of professional parenthood, no certainty and no stability of financing, lack of funds for job positions for professional parents, insufficient financial contributions for the child, no regular indexation of those contributions, weak initial equipment, no diaper allowance, professional parents do not receive bonuses, weak funding of the costs of the professional parent and the children.
The departments of social-legal child protection and social curatela in labour, social, and family offices, together with nongovernmental organizations, acknowledge underfunding and too few free places for professional families in institutions.
In our opinion, the set limits should be increased; to some extent this depends on the leadership of the children’s home and the possibility of sponsored donations for furnishing the household of a professional family. The first level was the general lack of funds for transition to professional parenthood: a lack of financial resources in children’s homes for new job positions for professional parents was noted, limiting and narrowing the process of introducing this type of care into practice. This may truly be one of the reasons why some children’s homes still did not have professional parents during the time of the research, but this argument can also be used as a convenient excuse. Several nonprofit organizations pointed to a persistent level of uncertainty or lack of stability in the overall support system for this general layer of professional parenthood financing.
The second level on which financial problems were raised was the costs of the child entrusted to the care of a professional parent. All participants reported inadequate financial coverage of expenses for the child. The provided contributions were perceived in a large majority as far too low relative to prices (for older children and for young children who need diapers).
It was also criticized that these contributions have not been revalued and automatically adjusted for years to rising prices. The research also noted that some professional parents are able to cover the deficit of contributions from their own budget and the child does not feel the shortage, while others, however, get into financial problems. Several professional parents and nonprofit organizations pointed to limitations in the design of the allowance for children in professional parent care, namely that certain needs cannot be covered from it—for example, a child’s hobbies and talent development. They also complained about the method of settling the allowance, in which too much emphasis is placed on making the amount exactly match to the last cent. Many PRs would welcome a so-called starter package when a child enters the household—for example, a bed, stroller, and clothing.
The third area of financing problems was raised only by professional parents. In this area, too, they returned to valuing their own work and spoke about bonuses as a variable part of salary. Some professional parents complained that they do not receive bonuses (not even at year-end), and there was also the opinion that bonuses could be used as motivation for professional parents. This issue, however, belongs more to the area of labour relations. From the comparison of answers across the individual study groups, it follows that directors of children’s homes placed greater emphasis on overall financing of professional parenthood (lack of funds for PR jobs), while professional parents focused on insufficient child allowances and paying for their needs.
Other negatives listed by the Club of Substitute Parents include that a home is formed for the child only for as long as a return to their biological family or to some form of substitute family care is possible. Another downside is that you do not have a first priority right to request foster care or adoption of a specific child you may have raised for years. One day the news comes that someone is interested in the child and no one will ask whether they may. You are a professional, an employee of a children’s home, and not the legal representative of the children, so in many matters the decision is made by the director. In addition, children in a professional family usually cannot be chosen. This very much depends on the director of the specific children’s home. One must also take into account that the child may be very difficult, may learn poorly, or behave oddly. They may not be the beautiful, kind, smiling children you expect. But it is possible you are their last chance. (Nebyť sám, 2009). It should be noted that it is both work and vocation. Child upbringing is always a vocation, and for that reason not everyone can do it. Professional parenthood, however, is work for which you are paid. Becoming a professional parent is not easy, do not let your illusions mislead you. Those children will not be as you imagine, and you will have 24 hours to mature, come to terms with reality, and assume responsibility for children you did not even know existed.
Besides the demands and negatives of professional parenthood, which we described, there are also positives: the child is not in a children’s home, where they are one among many. They have a chance to experience a family and real life. They have an opportunity for personal development and have people who are willing to attend to them individually. They do not have to constantly fight for favor with others.
The child learns social bonds and learns to create and maintain relationships. They can become emotionally attached to their future parents, be able to experience the depth of the relationship, which is not only fundamental for the child but for every person the alpha and omega of a satisfying life. Their needs will no longer be met only at a basic level, but someone will truly listen to what the child wants and needs. You can create for them an environment of trust and safety, provide a home, and give them love. (Institute of Professional Parenthood, 2009).
2 Quantitative respondent sample
For our quantitative research we selected a questionnaire form consisting of twelve questions, nine closed and three open-ended. We approached single students of the University of Health and Social Work of St. Elizabeth, living in the Blessed Zdenka Schelingová College, in the study programmes Social Work, Psychology, Mission and Charity, and Dental Technology, whom we assume will in the future prepare for marriage and parenthood. We asked students to contact their parents and investigated awareness of professional parenthood and in what kind of family they had grown up. The age range of respondents was 20 to 35 years and for parents 40 to 60 years. We gave out questionnaires to 75 students and 75 parents, 150 questionnaires in total.
Respondents were divided into two categories: 1. Category of respondents—single students from 20 to 35 years 2. Category of respondents—parents of students from 40 to 60 years
A total of 150 questionnaires were distributed and 125 were returned, which means that the return rate was 83.3%. Of these, 3 questionnaires were unusable due to insufficient completion. A total of 122 questionnaires were used. We distributed the questionnaires in the second half of November 2018 and data collection ended at the end of January 2019. The questionnaire was completed by 69 respondents aged 20 to 35. In terms of male participation there were 24 respondents, i.e., 34,8% participation. In terms of female participation 45 respondents took part in the survey, i.e., 65,2%. In carrying out the research we wanted to determine respondents’ level of education. Of the total 122 respondents, 68 have university education and 54 have secondary education. In the age group of 20 to 35 years there were 69 respondents, of which 27 respondents, representing 39.1%, have secondary education. Forty-two respondents have university education, representing 60.9%. In the 40 to 60 group there is a nearly balanced educational profile. 27 respondents have secondary education, i.e., 50,9% and 26 respondents are university educated, which represents 49,1%.
3 Evaluation of results
As already mentioned, the goal of the empirical part of the quantitative study was to find out the views of respondents from two age groups—young adults and their parents—on professional parenthood, what they see as its positives and negatives, and then compare their views. We were also interested in whether respondents had an interest in professional parenthood in the future. When evaluating the results, we found that none of the respondents had grown up in a professional family.
Respondents believe that the main benefit of professional parenthood is to give a child who has so far not experienced family life and has been taken from a family environment at least for a certain period a complete family, to provide them with love and an individual approach. It is also to give the child a relationship figure and, according to a secure attachment pattern, a protective factor in child development that corrects disruptions in the attachment relationship between child and parent and is therefore a corrective experience for the child; support for the child in decision-making in important situations and questions (choice of secondary school, professional direction, home visits, peer relationships).
The research also showed that according to respondents, it is a wonderful opportunity to become a parent and share experiences with a child. The relationship bond is very important for every child. It is an invisible emotional bond that very specifically connects two people (parent and child) in time and space. A child primarily forms the relationship bond with the person who plays and communicates with them, which does not necessarily reflect whether that person also feeds and changes the child. But if a child is hungry or needs changing, they experience significant discomfort and communicate this by crying. It is therefore highly likely that they will create a relationship bond with the person who responds to the child’s needs and ultimately takes care of them. The way we communicate with the child and the regularity of this contact are equally crucial. We believe that people who want to become professional parents are often those who themselves experienced a professional family so that they can help children with similar fates as they had. In our research, this fact was not confirmed because, as we already stated, we had no respondent who grew up in a professional family. Respondents agree—similarly to what is stated in Filadelfiová’s research (2008)—that it is a good opportunity to work with children and create values for society. Some professional parents do not consider this profession as a job, but as a life vocation.
Among respondents aged 20 to 35 (of a total of 69), only six considered the possibility of becoming a professional parent, which is 8,7%. The remaining respondents (91,3%) had not considered such a possibility.
Among respondents aged 40 to 60, of whom there were 53, only 3 respondents considered becoming a professional parent, 5,7%, and the remaining 50 respondents—94,3%—had not considered this possibility.
Table 1: Did you ever consider becoming a professional parent? Source: Author’s own processing
In the research we found that among the benefit and advantage respondents in the 20 to 35 group mostly considered financial top-up. We can agree only partly with this statement, because many professional parents and nonprofit organizations in studies, as well as Filadelfiová in 2008, state that funding of professional parenthood is not sufficiently remunerated. After communication with director PaedDr. Slávka Oroszová from the Centre for Children and Families in Bratislava, we received the information that the current base salary of a professional parent for a healthy child without problems is approximately 726 € gross. Each parent, however, has a different salary, depending mainly on the level of care intensity for the child and the number of children. It should be noted that salary also depends on the age of the entrusted child. Children’s homes can provide supplements for a child according to the level of care required. 21,4% of respondents in our study indicated that financing is insufficient. In accredited training for future professional parents, 6 sessions are devoted to financing with the lecturer. This session is also focused on clarifying motivation for accepting a child, openness and ability to accept a child into the family, as well as expectations of children and parents, working with one’s own past and losses, and self-awareness.
Among further risks respondents mentioned: frustration from feeling that the child entrusted to them is not theirs and they have it only for a limited time; different treatment of one’s own child and the entrusted child. Biological family is closely connected by years lived together, memories, experiences, and a new household member—the entrusted child—with which it has nothing in common. Certainly, a new family composition may over time come to pleasant coexistence, but at the beginning it will require many compromises.
Among the most frequent repeated answers on the benefits of professional parenthood, respondents aged 20 to 35 and 40 to 60 indicated that having a complete family, individual approach to the child, becoming a parent, having a child, getting a job, and getting a financial boost were selected.
Table 2: Advantages of professional parenthood. Source: Author’s own processing
Other problems emerged from professional parents—quarrels, physical assault, and the existence of differences between one’s own children and accepted children. The error is that in such situations professional parents did not seek professional help, referring to question 11 of our study. Support also did not come from social-legal child protection and social curatela. Strict oversight is neglected, and therefore serious situations are overlooked that could be addressed in professional families (Hažírová, 2018).
In our research, 53% of respondents, in the question of child adaptation, reported a negative experience in another professional family in relation to the above-mentioned issue. We believe that, just as disagreements occur in every family, so too in a professional family. But if a child has a relevant negative experience, such parents, in our view, should consider whether they should continue as professional parents, because this can have more negative than positive effects for the child’s further development.
Another negative is emotional attachment. At the 2018 Colloquium of Case Studies conference we heard from the director of the children’s home in Sečovce that if a professional parent becomes attached to a child, they are not a professional. We respectfully disagree and identify such an opinion as unprofessional, because without at least minimal attachment the child’s needs would not be sufficiently met. We believe a child should not be moved to other professional families if the child is not problematic; in our view this should have a minimal impact on the child’s psyche. The child would then become settled in their substitute environment and would feel safer, and thus could develop more and be fulfilled. From the 8th to 10th sessions of accredited preparation, professional parents work on the child’s adaptation in their family and emotional attachment, the formation and development of attachment, attachment disturbances, their impact on the child’s life in the family and possibilities of support; the loss of the biological mother and its influence on the child’s future development, coping with and processing child losses, and ways to improve building contacts.
More serious problems that occurred during professional parenthood mostly stemmed from trauma experienced in childhood in one’s biological family or in a children’s home. For this reason, we think that stabilization of the family environment would also be suitable for professional parents. We believe this and recommend leaving a child, if they are trouble-free and content, in the professional family where they are, to grow up until adulthood. There they have a chance to experience a stable family environment.
Our next interest was to determine respondents’ awareness of professional parenthood. Respondents know professional parenthood within substitute care, but they do not know sufficiently well the conditions for becoming professional parents. The percentage is high in both categories: among respondents aged 20 to 35 it was as high as 65,2%, and in the 40 to 60 category the non-knowledge of conditions was at 62,3%. We would recommend speaking more about professional parenthood and especially about conditions in the future. This topic should be addressed in schools and conferences so that awareness of professional parenthood is increased in this way, too. We note that every year Vysoká škola zdravotníctva a sociálnej práce sv. Alžbety, n. o., organizes the professional conference Colloquium of Case Studies, where we are regular participants and focus on professional parenthood and other problems, where experts from social, psychological, legal, and academic fields are present. At this conference, professional parents and their entrusted children also appear and speak about their experiences and problems. A major plus of this conference is the annual publication of proceedings and the fact that it is also open to the lay public. The Colloquium of Case Studies has been held since 2015 also under the patronage of other universities. Our results showed that young adults are slightly more informed about the conditions for becoming professional parents than respondents from the older category.
Answers to the question of whether respondents had previously considered becoming professional parents in the past surprised us, because only 14,4% of respondents, which is 9 respondents, had considered it. We found that in the future, no respondents from both categories want to become professional parents. In the future it would be appropriate to ask in questionnaires: What reasons lead respondents to the fact that they do not want to become professional parents. Unfortunately, we must note that our research does not contain this question.
Respondents aged 20 to 35 think that entrusting a child to the care of a professional parent is beneficial. Their positive response was 73,9%, i.e., 51 respondents, and 26,1%—18 respondents could not express an opinion. Among respondents aged 40 to 60, agreement was expressed by 62,3%—33 respondents and 37,7% of respondents could not express their opinion.
3 Recommendations for Practice
For the future, we recommend for practice:
- Improve payment conditions for professional parents so they have greater motivation to become professional parents.
- Move a child from one professional family to another as little as possible, unless there is a serious reason, so that relationship bonds are not disrupted, because this ultimately has a negative impact on the child’s psychological development.
- Focus on enabling professional parents to take leave so that the entrusted child can be with them on holiday, if the professional parent agrees.
- Promote professional parenthood through the media, increase the number of conferences and examples of good practice, so that the child does not have negative experiences.
- Improve the quality of preparation for professional parenthood—increase the number of hours of professional preparation especially in areas such as attachment relationships, the child’s emotional attachment, learning to understand developmental needs of the child, their past, and understanding child behaviour in a professional family, as well as focus on work with the child’s biological family and effective communication in the professional family.
Mgr. Martin Lukáč*
LIST OF USED LITERATURE
FILADELFIOVÁ, J. 2008. Increasing the Quality of Care and Upbringing Provision for Children in Children’s Homes ‒ focusing on professional families. online 2008 cit. 10.08.2018 Dostupné na: https://www.ceit.sk/IVPR/images/IVPR/vyskum/2008/Filadelfiova/Zvysovanie_kvality.pd f
HAŽÍROVÁ, O. 2018. Substitute family care – about the length of waiting for the desired child in the Prešov Region. In PROHUMAN. Peer-reviewed scientific professional internet journal – social work, psychology, pedagogy, social policy, nursing [online], published 2018-11-20. [cit. 2020-10-04]. Available on the internet: https://www.prohuman.sk/socialna-praca/nahradna-rodinna-starostlivost-o-dlzke-cakania-na-vytuzene-dieta-v-presovskom-kraji
LUKÁČ, M. 2019. The contribution of professional parenthood in substitute care: diploma thesis. Bratislava: Vysoká škola zdravotníctva a sociálnej práce sv. Alžbety, 2019. 73 strán.
Nebyť sám. Fortnightly on substitute parenthood. Number 2, volume 5, December 2009, Bratislava: Association of Substitute Families. EV 2951/09. p. 20. [cit. 2020-10-10]. Available on the internet: http://www.anr.sk/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/nebytSam200902_v3.pdf
ROHÁČEK M. et al. 2012. We get used to each other; a new substitute family in the adaptation process. Praha: Středisko náhradní rodinné péče o.s., 2012. 38 s. ISBN 978-8087455-12-8.